“The grief could only end if a place could be found for it to begin.”
A Child at Dawn: The Healing of a Memory
My heart welcomes you to Wings — a blog about healing after child-loss and other matters of the heart.
I am so sorry for your loss. I am grateful you have found your way here. There are no words I can write that will heal the pain of losing your child, but that is what I am seeking, both for you and for myself — healing words.
I am writing, stringing words together, like a strand of pearls, in the hopes of continuing to heal my heart and yours. I am listening to my heart and putting those words down on paper. Writing helped heal my heart after my son, Kelly, died of a heart attack at the age of twenty-three. Writing became my therapy, my way to begin to heal, to empty my heart of the pain and grief I was feeling — to release the sadness, to “write it out of my heart” and put it on paper. I cried and I wrote. I wrote and I cried. I found and attended a weekly support group for bereaved parents called Forever Loved. I shared my story and cried. I listened as other parents shared their stories and they cried. A few years later, I was invited to facilitate Forever Loved. I accepted.
As a way of helping the parents in the Forever Loved support group more easily share their stories, I bought a stuffed brown bear. My thought was that the bear would offer comfort and it did. We passed the bear to each parent as they spoke. They held the bear as if it were a child — their child, embracing the bear as they told their story.
My heart and your heart are broken.
“Somewhere, somehow, in the midst of the sorrow, I am able to remember the love, which, in the end, is the reason for all of this pain in my heart. Then I do it again. I bend down, pick them up, and dust them off — all the pieces of my broken heart. Once again, I have transcended that broken place inside me. Once again, I will invite life inside my heart. Once again, I will be grateful to have known a love this big, even in the midst of such deep sorrow, I will always be grateful. Thankful. Thankful for twenty-three years of a love this deep. Very thankful.”
(From Star Child: A Mother’s Journey through Grief)